OPD footfalls decline, Doctors announce Chintan Shivir.

Mumbai : Taking cue from the ‘expected & predicted’ Chintan Shivir of the Congress party after their poll debacle in the upcoming Delhi Elections next month, the Quackdoctors Association of India (QAI) have announced a three-day brainstorming Chintan Shivir in Mumbai of their own.

The shadow of dwindling OPD footfalls in-spite of the end of the vacation time / New Year fever, and ‘healthy months’ lasting more than they should, has made the medical fraternity worried. Around 400 quacks are expected to attend the Chintan Shivir.

In an exclusive interview with the Quackdoses, Dr. K’abhi Matbann, president of the QAI said, “Medical profession is no longer a white collar job. Charted Accountants have GST work all round the year apart from ITR filings, lawyers are busy with litigations perennially, but doctors are now out of work most months of the year, except the monsoons. Also, the government’s strict action on the pharmaceutical company which took 30 doctors to Paris and Monaco for improving their ‘knowledge’ recently, and subsequent action on those doctors for professional misconduct needs to be contemplated upon. The association will introspect in the next three days how to embark on a new direction by confronting various challenges to pave the way for our bright future, and of the future generation of Quacks. If needed, like the visionary leader Rahul Gandhi (pun intended), we will also undertake a nationwide ‘Kashmir to Kanyakumari Patient Jodo’ yatra to revive the connection with our trusting consumers.”

Unconfirmed sources have claimed that similar to the standard ‘Please correlate clinically’ written on radiology reports, as a solution to the low footfall problems, QAI has communicated to all its members via various Whatsapp groups to write ‘Please Visit Again’ on their prescriptions and prominently display it in their clinics too.