Thursday, February 8, 2018

Man claims his mother "vibrates", research on new symptom underway.


Mumbai: In a never before reported incident in the history of medical science, a man has claimed that his mother who was having fever since 2 days has started “vibrating”.

Mobile shop owner Pappu Pager who brought his sick mother to the Emergency Department at the Quakdoses Multispeciality Hospital made the perplexing revelation. When the duty doctor tried to explain that she could just be shivering, Mr. Pager argued, “My mother’s teeth were not chattering but instead her entire body was “vibrating” and my credibility should not be questioned as I have been part of this mobile industry since the days Nokia launched the mobile phones with a vibrator.”

Among intense pressure with the general public already scared from the COVID 19, the information of the new symptom has been conveyed to WHO and the writers of Harrisons Principle of Internal Medicine who have sent their representatives Dr. Arun Swaminathan and Dr. Deepak Kumar Singh respectively to investigate the matter.

The treating Physician Dr. K'abhi Matbann has however refused to comment on the developments and the patient’s management till the complete blood workup reports are available.

Meanwhile, The Quackdoses Hospital & Research Institute has been flooded with queries from young women for existence of any drug which produces “vibrations” as its primary effect if given to their boyfriend or husband.

P.S- This is a true incident when a man told me, "Mummy ko 2 din se bahut fever hai and aj subah se toh woh bahut "Vibrate" maar rahi hai."

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