CME invitation goes viral, Knowledge thirsty doctors register in hordes.

Mumbai : In a revolutionary idea which might usher in a new era of medical CME invitation, the Quackdoses Multispeciality Hospital (QMH) sent out a symposium registration flyer stating ‘Applied for Cocktail Approval’, sending doctors into a frenzy on social media, Twitter and all medical Whatsapp groups in the country.

It is a well known fact that most CME invitations in Maharashtra now have ‘Applied for MMC (May-be Medical Council) points’ mentioned on them, as bait and in the hope that more doctors will pay and register for the conference. Also, it has been observed that, with or without credit points, CMEs where registration-invitation flyers mention ‘Dinner followed by cocktails’ always draw huge crowd and are a hit among the knowledge thirsty doctors.

In an exclusive interview with our Samwadata, the organizing secretary at QMH Dr. Kabhi Mat’bann™ said, “For our symposium titled ‘Alcohol is the medicine to life, and joining medicine is injurious to health’, we were yet to get formal approval for hospital sponsored cocktails from the management. Though it was a minor human error, where instead of ‘Applied for MMC points’, the typist mentioned ‘Applied for Cocktail approval’, our registrations are now full even before the last closing date. It truly reflects the enthusiasm among the doctors to interact with our distinguished speakers and panelists.”

Unconfirmed sources have claimed that maximum registrations were from NEET PG aspirants, in the hope of getting unlimited ‘neat’ fluid boluses.

Patient undergoes Robotic Circumcision, refuses to pay surgeon.

MUMBAI: In an incident which has sent shock waves in the surgical community, a patient admitted at the Quackdoses Multispeciality Hospital refused to pay the surgeon’s fee after undergoing a robotic circumcision.

Robotic surgeries, although facing stiff resistance from the insurance companies, is now slowly becoming the preferred choice for most surgical procedures. With the advent of the fast-growing AI based technologies and robotics, surgeons are already scared that they might soon become an extinct species in the coming decade.

In an exclusive interview with the Quackdoses, patient Dis’Kount Dey said, “The surgeon had offered me 3 methods of circumcision – by open method, laparoscopically or by minimal access through the testicles, and by robotic surgery. He counselled me that robotic surgery offered the fastest recovery, hence at the insistence of my wife, I opted for it. During the surgery, I was shit scared that the robot might cut off more than what I had consented for. To my dismay, I was shocked when I realized that ‘Robodoc’ ⟨™⟩ did my complete surgery, while the surgeon was busy playing some video game on his hi-tech gaming console. What should I pay the surgeon for, for playing on his joystick while ‘Robodoc’ dangerously played with mine? ”

Furthermore, rubbing salt on the surgeon’s wound, the patient gave 5 star rating on Google reviews to ‘Robodoc’ instead, with a special mention about the elderly assistant nurse who let him see the excised foreskin after surgery and politely asking him, “Sir-come-see-son.”

Unconfirmed sources have claimed that after knowing that the patient only paid for the consumables, OT charges and for the anesthesiologist’s coffee, the disgruntled surgeon has refused to do the patient’s follow up dressings.